Hence, the Mandys will always be more goodlooking than the Samanthas…

As I was writing the monthly Sågverket column (don’t even ask!) I happened to reflect upon the fact that I always, no matter what, have to be on the other side of the fence. Among the “pros” I am “against” and among the Jews I’m an Arab. If the world is Rocky then I am Ivan Drago. Why is this? Why is there such a desire to desire that which others do not desire?

For whatever reason I got a flashback from when I was seven or eight. One hot summer day, all the young boys in the hood (all white) were hanging in the treehouse or whatever. I can’t remember exactly. Anyways, we had two pics of girls torn from a magazine – one of Mandy Smith and one of Samantha Fox. Now all the boys were of the same oppinion – Samantha Fox was the most goodlookin’ girl in the world. But you see, I didn’t want to share girl with the others. Also, Mandy was the more mysterious one. And knowing that the others were completely uninterested in her I figured she would probably think I was pretty mysterious too.

Read my words. This is not just some cute story from childhood. This is doctrine. I seek that which others do not follow. I long for the mysterious and the unexplored. This is the call of the wild – I spend my life hunting Mandys.